Looking for a Catamaran Cruising Blog?

If you found this blog via a link from a cruising site ~ we did cruise Mexico on our Ocean 49 cat for a season. See the first text box on the right for links to our preparations, trip down Baja, life in Mexico, cruising and trip back up to SoCal. Unfortunately we are back to the grind in the USA...

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Blog About The Log

No, not that kind of log.
Not one like my diary the wind speed, lat & long, wind direction, wave height, blah-di-blah...
But one about the sailing rag, The Log.
You know, the one where I won the jacket?
For Stan kissing a puffer fish?
The Log!
Let's start at the back, where any well adjusted reader would.
Ads.
Sailboat ads.
Mooring ads.
Just in case I want to move to Newport or the hit me with your best East wind shot, Avalon.And quite affordable at $875,000.
$875,000 for a mooring?
For an engine block with a floaty and a slimy line in a crowded harbor?
Huh?
Am I missing something here?
Such as the boat that comes with the mooring?

Ok, skip that.
Flip back a few more pages (remember we start at the back) to the ever entertaining Harbor Blotter!
Yep, what the Harborales do for kicks fun work.
Sometimes it's as innocent as helping a boater find a dinghy that floated away.
Assisting a newbie with an overturned kayak.
Or kids with a rental paddleboat who just lost their rudder.
And sometimes it's JUSTICE.
WHAT GOES AROUND COMES AROUND.
KARMA.Gee, you haul your boat in our yard and neglect to pay your bill for several months?
Sob lie, lie, lie, lie, lie, full of lies story.
Lie some more.
Then have some drug addict skank thieves piece of shit friends over.
With weapons.
Yes, weapons!
Hee hee hee...
Enjoy jail you washed up piece of shit, crap, lying SOB (sorry to bring your mom into this as your dad actually seemed pretty nice, but oh by the way he it totally sick of your shit too) thief, liar, liar, liar, did I mention I hate liars? worthless piece of poor excuse for a human being ex-client.
So maybe he can trade some jail favors and send us the $6k he owes us...?
Karma Mr. AngelinaJolie'sBoyfriend'sName FemaleSheepPresentTenseSuffix!

Flip back several more pages.
What is this?
Stowaway raccoons?Yep, happens all the time.
Often with bears.
Buffalo.
Cows & horses too.
And sometimes with skunks, alpacas, turtle doves, cougars, mealy worms, penguins, ladybugs (the worst!), orcas, hummingbirds (listen for the hum ~ dead giveaway), worms (yeah, well sometimes you can't prevent this one), toucans, antelope, elephants, tsetse flies, rattlesnakes and labrador puppies.
Oh those stowaways!
Seriously ~ stop your boat and don't come to the island?
How about stop your boat and jump overboard!
And there is a charge for the removal service?
How about you pay me to not bring the raccoons skunks, alpacas, turtle doves, cougars, mealy worms, penguins, ladybugs, orcas, hummingbirds, worms, toucans, antelope, elephants, tsetse flies, rattlesnakes and labrador puppies to the island?

And if there is a great flood is it then okay?

2 comments:

jomamma said...

LOL loved this post! Why don't you tell us how you really feel...

Hubby went to look for a house for us when we were transferring from one end of No. Tex to the other. My only instructions were that I'd like to live in the country. He checked the ads and went to check on a house outside a small town. As he walked up on the porch he heard something inside the house. He hadn't seen any other cars out front, the place looked vacant, but he knocked anyway... still heard things inside, but no answer to his knocks. Finally walked over to a window and peaked in, he was looking face to face with a cow! So after that, my instructions on house hunting included "no animals."

jomamma said...

Have you ever seen the movie The Pack?